Just thought I'd share this so you guys can have a good laugh (LITERALLY at my expense).
The name of the girl and the shop isn't actually important, so I'll leave their identities out of it.
A short while ago, I made a booking at one of the popular agencies and arrived early. While waiting for my appointment, I decided to grab a snack, a shawarma to be exact, which turned out to be the cause of my downfall.
The text to proceed arrives on time and I made my way to the condo without incident. Walk inside and do the peek behind the door and she looks decent. Everything proceeded smoothly up to that point. Then I felt something in the stomach. At first it didn't seem that bad so I ignore it and we get into the bedroom. Some pleasantries exchanged, "how are you doing", "is it cold outside", yada, yada, she texts her boss to let her know all okay, then we start taking off our clothes. You know, just the usual same old routine.
By the time we get the toilet I felt the queasy sensation in my stomach much more intensely, but still bearable. I made a quick mental debate with myself whether I should take a quick shit or not, but the cheap side of me felt that it would be a waste of valuable time, so we proceed to the shower. She washes me, front, back, down below, I fondle her tits a little, crack a few dirty jokes that she probably didn't get but laughed along anyways out of courtesy.
So now I'm all fresh and clean but by the time I finish wiping my ass dry I realized that shit just literally got real. If I didn't take a shit there and then, shit would inevitably explode out and probably do so while I was in the middle of fucking which would be a real shitfest.
Long story short, I explained to the girl that I needed to excuse myself for a few minutes to use the toilet alone. She obliged, and as soon as she walk out I got on the toilet and all shit broke loose. I half dumped half sprayed the toilet with semi-solid excrement which took place through several intervals.
I'm sure you guys all experienced it before. The feeling that you finished taking your shit, wiped your ass clean, then realized another fresh batch was on its way.
So there I was, clock ticking at $5/minute while I was in the john. John means toilet mind you, I was NOT butt fucking another customer.
Not sure how long it finally took but I did know that I needed another shower by the end, and that my legs were too weak to fuck even if she allowed me extra time.
All throughout this ordeal she was knocking intermittently on the door asking if I was ok, to which I replied "yes" while knowing its "no". When I finally came out, she had this most weird expression as if she was worried that I'd die and thus cause problems for her with the popo, a struggle to control not to laugh, and concern that I wouldn't pay up.
Well, I did pay in full for time spent doing something other than what I came there to do. And I apologized to both her and the keeper for stinking up their toilet. I walked out feeling quite a bit lighter, both me and my wallet.
So that was it. My worst and most embarrassing hunting experience ever! Hope it never happens to any of you guys. Well except for those who leech and never share reviews. |