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发表于 2014-12-6 04:15:07
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What a read...I can relate. I'm very similar to you, probably a younger version. As a young G the motto has always been ''first make money, then fk b!tches'' but over time I develop favorites that I will see on a regular basis. Lots of money lots of time, go eat take out at least 5 times a week, sometimes book my fav mm's for early noon session just to drop by and say hi, bring some drink or food and not even fk, then later on go out with my boiz and book some new mm to go try on the same day.
Sometimes I ask myself ''wtf am I doing?'' I have a loving gf of 5 years that's been with me since she was 17 YO virgin, with me when I'm broke and a nobody. Plan on getting married and having children in a few years. Honestly at this point it's past being a hobby.
Today walking through Yorkdale, walked in Tiffanys, picked up my girl a nice piece with some diamonds on it, subconsciously I told the clerk to throw in a cheap sterling necklace on my tab as well and ''put it in a fancy box just like the expensive piece''.
So hard to not have emotional attachments when you see a person so often, it might just be all an act, an illusion, a routine, a habit. At the end of the day the attachments become real and they become part of your life.
I've gotten advice about it, my homie would say''once you feel emotional and start acting like a fag, just cut, delete all contact info and don't turn back'', but I've also seen friends that ''sank'' and ended up with mm's as wife/gf.
wish I could add you to friends to talk in PM, too bad my rank is too low ATM. Really good read, really appreciated. |
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